...leads to a life resurrected.
Ours.
Last week in Mom Time, I shared on a very personal level how Jesus Christ has transformed my life. It's not something I am prone do to publicly because it is a messy story, filled with heartbreak and sin, mine and those committed against me, but it is my story. 1 Peter 4:10 says that we should share the gift we have been given for the good of the Kingdom, and my story is the gift God has given me. To not share is to not bear witness to the life changing power that Jesus brings to a life.
We spent some time in previous weeks talking about roots, those deeply held core beliefs that define our fruit, the behaviors we do and the words we speak. When we let Jesus into our hearts, and into our messes, He can change our roots. He took this girl who felt unlovable, unworthy, ugly, unnoticeable, and changed her into someone who knows she is loved by the Lord Most High. Everything else pales in comparison to that knowledge. David Crowder sings in How He Loves "When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory and I realize how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me."
This was not accomplished by following the rules of a religion, but by entering into a relationship with Jesus Christ and giving my life over to Him. Many people say they aren't into "church" or "religion", and that's a good thing, because Jesus is not after either. He isn't looking for people who can keep a schedule of various life events to show their punch card at Heaven's door; He is looking for people willing to follow and learn from Him, to follow His example of loving others, and to trust Him with their very lives.
Sharing our lives and our secrets can be scary, but maybe you have walked through something that you can encourage someone else through. Even the ugly stuff. Actually, especially the ugly stuff. Share the gift that He has given you for the good of His Kingdom. Share how He has helped you through something (2 Corinthians 1:3).
I am also so excited to tell you that following the lesson that I had the privilege to pray with someone as she asked Jesus into her heart. You never know how your story will touch someone else's. If you are in need of the life transforming love of Jesus Christ and have never asked Him to be your Savior, I am praying that you make that step. There is no magic formula.
In your own words, admit to God that you know you are a sinner and in need of His forgiveness. Tell Him that you believe that Jesus is His Son and that He died to pay the price for your sins. Tell Him that you would like Jesus to come into your heart and be your Savior, and commit your life to Him. There is nothing you need to fix first, nothing you need so set right. Jesus is the only Way to set things right, the only One who can. If you have never accepted Him as Savior, He is waiting for you.
Take His resurrected Life so that you can live a life resurrected.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Training Up Your Kids in Three Easy Steps
Ok, I may have oversimplified, but at least I caught your eye. We covered discipline for two weeks and how to teach your kiddoes about Jesus with our guest speaker Michele Stamm from Family Time Ministries.
The gist of Christian discipline is not spanking, contrary to what the world would have you believe. What separates Christian discipline from the rest of the world is the motive. We are not interested in having kids who act like good kids, although I freely admit to being willing to settle for that on a lot of days. We want kids who do right because they have a relationship with Jesus and want to please Him above all else.
Think back to when you were a kid, or maybe even to more recent events. You behaved in a way that was expected, but in your head you were rolling your eyes, whining, and counting the minutes until you get could out of the situation. Your heart was not in the behavior at all, but anyone who looked at you had no idea what was going on under the surface. That is the goal of worldy discipline in a nutshell: everyone conform to an expected set of behaviors so we can all be happy.
The desired behavior is usually achieved through a series of negative and positive sanctions: time outs, consequences, and physical punishment. There is no heart change here.
Christian discipline takes a multi-faceted approach. Naughtiness is referred to appropriately: sin. No excuse is made for the little darlings. Although being over-tired and hungry may predispose them to bad behavior, it is not sugar-coated. Hitting your brother is not kind and Jesus wants us to be kind to one another, even when our tummies are hungry. Naming the offense as sin has the benefit of your child realizing they are a sinner and in need of the saving grace of God. Through consistently applied teaching and training, a discipleship of your child in the ways of the Lord, and the work of the Holy Spirit, your child will, over time, develop a heart that is sensitive to God.
This would be a good time to insert the scripture "Do not grow weary in doing good, for in time, you will reap a harvest of righteousness. (Galatians 6:9). This is not magic and it is not easy. You must be aware of your own motivations and desires before you can effectively train your kids. This is why we covered the tree in our opening lesson. Your next step, the one that may take the next ten years, is to help your kids discover their roots and deal with them in a godly manner.
Grace and reconciliation are key to disciplining kids in a godly manner. We don't hold grudges our remind them of how many times they've committed the same offense. We don't belittle them. At the end of a "training opportunity", we teach them to seek forgiveness from God and the person they've sinned against. Both parties, the offender and the offended, learn about forgiveness. Sometimes it is just as hard to give as to ask.
In preparation of our lessons, I leaned heavily on Ginger Plowman's book Don't Make Me Count To Three. It is an easy read but with a depth of knowledge that is profound in its simplicity. She clearly defines why Christian discipline is the only thing that will lead our kids to repentance and a right relationship with God. She offers solutions and examples that are easy to relate to, and encourages parents to not give up. In case you missed the announcement, Mom Time has ordered copies of Wise Words for Moms (the one that Kim shared) for everyone.
Discipline is not all about punishment, but teaching and encouraging as well. Michele Stamm shared her resources from Family Time Ministries and showed us some fun activities to do with our kids to make the gospel come to life. There are manuals full of activies on the website geared to all ages of kids. If you need some help with this, and who doesn't, check out the website. You can also sign up for activities to be emailed to you on a quarterly basis.
Raising our kids is nothing to be taken lightly; it is also nothing to freak out about. God has not left us to wander blindly. Be diligent, consistent, and loving. You can do this. Here are links to two handouts that may help you in your journey. One is Reasons You May Be Screaming At Your Children and the other is To Spank or Not To Spank.
The gist of Christian discipline is not spanking, contrary to what the world would have you believe. What separates Christian discipline from the rest of the world is the motive. We are not interested in having kids who act like good kids, although I freely admit to being willing to settle for that on a lot of days. We want kids who do right because they have a relationship with Jesus and want to please Him above all else.
Think back to when you were a kid, or maybe even to more recent events. You behaved in a way that was expected, but in your head you were rolling your eyes, whining, and counting the minutes until you get could out of the situation. Your heart was not in the behavior at all, but anyone who looked at you had no idea what was going on under the surface. That is the goal of worldy discipline in a nutshell: everyone conform to an expected set of behaviors so we can all be happy.
The desired behavior is usually achieved through a series of negative and positive sanctions: time outs, consequences, and physical punishment. There is no heart change here.
Christian discipline takes a multi-faceted approach. Naughtiness is referred to appropriately: sin. No excuse is made for the little darlings. Although being over-tired and hungry may predispose them to bad behavior, it is not sugar-coated. Hitting your brother is not kind and Jesus wants us to be kind to one another, even when our tummies are hungry. Naming the offense as sin has the benefit of your child realizing they are a sinner and in need of the saving grace of God. Through consistently applied teaching and training, a discipleship of your child in the ways of the Lord, and the work of the Holy Spirit, your child will, over time, develop a heart that is sensitive to God.
This would be a good time to insert the scripture "Do not grow weary in doing good, for in time, you will reap a harvest of righteousness. (Galatians 6:9). This is not magic and it is not easy. You must be aware of your own motivations and desires before you can effectively train your kids. This is why we covered the tree in our opening lesson. Your next step, the one that may take the next ten years, is to help your kids discover their roots and deal with them in a godly manner.
Grace and reconciliation are key to disciplining kids in a godly manner. We don't hold grudges our remind them of how many times they've committed the same offense. We don't belittle them. At the end of a "training opportunity", we teach them to seek forgiveness from God and the person they've sinned against. Both parties, the offender and the offended, learn about forgiveness. Sometimes it is just as hard to give as to ask.
In preparation of our lessons, I leaned heavily on Ginger Plowman's book Don't Make Me Count To Three. It is an easy read but with a depth of knowledge that is profound in its simplicity. She clearly defines why Christian discipline is the only thing that will lead our kids to repentance and a right relationship with God. She offers solutions and examples that are easy to relate to, and encourages parents to not give up. In case you missed the announcement, Mom Time has ordered copies of Wise Words for Moms (the one that Kim shared) for everyone.
Discipline is not all about punishment, but teaching and encouraging as well. Michele Stamm shared her resources from Family Time Ministries and showed us some fun activities to do with our kids to make the gospel come to life. There are manuals full of activies on the website geared to all ages of kids. If you need some help with this, and who doesn't, check out the website. You can also sign up for activities to be emailed to you on a quarterly basis.
Raising our kids is nothing to be taken lightly; it is also nothing to freak out about. God has not left us to wander blindly. Be diligent, consistent, and loving. You can do this. Here are links to two handouts that may help you in your journey. One is Reasons You May Be Screaming At Your Children and the other is To Spank or Not To Spank.
Friday, March 16, 2012
I Can't Help It...
The short answer to that statement is "Yes, you can."
The longer answer, the answer that takes time to explain and implement, is that everything we do, say, and think, flows out of what we believe to be true. The tricky part is figuring out what is actually going on under the surface.
I want you to picture a fruit tree. The fruit is the evidence of what kind of tree you have growing. Our tree is sustained by roots that dig deep. Our heart is contained in these roots, and as Luke 6:45 tells us, it is out of the overflow of the heart that the mouth speaks.
The anger, fear, or bitterness that sneaks out of our mouths reveals what is really going on inside our hearts. We need to examine our behavior, thoughts, and actions from the viewpoint of Christ. In John 15:5, He tells us that apart from Him we can bear no good fruit. Sounds a little far-fetched, because we like to think we are in complete control. Sometimes complete control is actually complete denial.
Apart from Christ, we can try and try but we can't change our hearts ourselves. It is the relationship with Jesus Christ that changes us from the inside out; the process requires our reaching to Him, but He does the work. An obedient heart and openness to something that may be contrary to what we believe to be true may be necessary for His fruit to bloom in us, but it will bloom.
As you evaluate your own words and actions, what do they say about the real you? What do you really believe about the people and world around you, about yourself? Before you say "That's just the way I am", offer your heart to Jesus and ask Him to change it, from the inside out.
The longer answer, the answer that takes time to explain and implement, is that everything we do, say, and think, flows out of what we believe to be true. The tricky part is figuring out what is actually going on under the surface.
I want you to picture a fruit tree. The fruit is the evidence of what kind of tree you have growing. Our tree is sustained by roots that dig deep. Our heart is contained in these roots, and as Luke 6:45 tells us, it is out of the overflow of the heart that the mouth speaks.
The anger, fear, or bitterness that sneaks out of our mouths reveals what is really going on inside our hearts. We need to examine our behavior, thoughts, and actions from the viewpoint of Christ. In John 15:5, He tells us that apart from Him we can bear no good fruit. Sounds a little far-fetched, because we like to think we are in complete control. Sometimes complete control is actually complete denial.
Apart from Christ, we can try and try but we can't change our hearts ourselves. It is the relationship with Jesus Christ that changes us from the inside out; the process requires our reaching to Him, but He does the work. An obedient heart and openness to something that may be contrary to what we believe to be true may be necessary for His fruit to bloom in us, but it will bloom.
As you evaluate your own words and actions, what do they say about the real you? What do you really believe about the people and world around you, about yourself? Before you say "That's just the way I am", offer your heart to Jesus and ask Him to change it, from the inside out.
"The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Galatians 5:22)"
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Happy Is the Home...
We spent a couple of weeks learning about home management. We are, as moms, the CEO's of our homes...the Chief Environmental Officers. You have probably heard the saying "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." Because our home is the place we are nururing, teaching, and loving our families, it makes sense that we would want them to run smoothly.
When it comes to cooking, being organized is key. Studies show that families who eat together have less incidence of teen pregnancy, drug use, and behavior issues. We can use the family dinner table to connect on a regular basis with our kids and husbands, share values, and process life together. If you are stressed out about getting dinner on the table, chances are that it will not be a relaxing experience. Take a few minutes to plan your meals, check your supplies, and make one trip to the store each week. Being organized also allows you to provide a meal for someone in need on short notice and bless someone else's family. I have found the website www.momonamission.me to be extremely helpful. It is a wealth of information, planning sheets, weekly menus, and great recipes. Check it out!
Along with feeding our families comes the responsibility of cleaning, organizing, and decorating our homes. Jessica and Erika taught on these subjects. The number one reason we should do anything is to glorify God, and if we are screaming at our kids because we can't find anything, we are not glorifying God. Jessica talked about the benefits of getting organized and having a routine to accomplish tasks. Involving your kids early on might make more work for you in the short run, but pays off in the long run. Erika gave us many tips on decorating our homes, but the best part of the talk in my eyes was her opening: Decorating is exciting but can lead to discontentment. Be careful that you are not basing your worth in the way your house looks. A great tip she had was to not put out all your stuff at once. That way, you can shop your storage when you are ready for a change. Great job, girls!
As you can see, the tasks and duties that come along with running your home are not an end in themselves. We use these activities to create an environment of peace, love, learning, and security for our families. Let us not fail to see the big picture behind the seemingly endless days of laundry, cooking, and cleaning. God has a plan for these years.
When it comes to cooking, being organized is key. Studies show that families who eat together have less incidence of teen pregnancy, drug use, and behavior issues. We can use the family dinner table to connect on a regular basis with our kids and husbands, share values, and process life together. If you are stressed out about getting dinner on the table, chances are that it will not be a relaxing experience. Take a few minutes to plan your meals, check your supplies, and make one trip to the store each week. Being organized also allows you to provide a meal for someone in need on short notice and bless someone else's family. I have found the website www.momonamission.me to be extremely helpful. It is a wealth of information, planning sheets, weekly menus, and great recipes. Check it out!
Along with feeding our families comes the responsibility of cleaning, organizing, and decorating our homes. Jessica and Erika taught on these subjects. The number one reason we should do anything is to glorify God, and if we are screaming at our kids because we can't find anything, we are not glorifying God. Jessica talked about the benefits of getting organized and having a routine to accomplish tasks. Involving your kids early on might make more work for you in the short run, but pays off in the long run. Erika gave us many tips on decorating our homes, but the best part of the talk in my eyes was her opening: Decorating is exciting but can lead to discontentment. Be careful that you are not basing your worth in the way your house looks. A great tip she had was to not put out all your stuff at once. That way, you can shop your storage when you are ready for a change. Great job, girls!
As you can see, the tasks and duties that come along with running your home are not an end in themselves. We use these activities to create an environment of peace, love, learning, and security for our families. Let us not fail to see the big picture behind the seemingly endless days of laundry, cooking, and cleaning. God has a plan for these years.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Get Moving!
Dr. Jamie Krzykowski blessed us last week with a fitness lesson. She taught us a variety of exercises that would be suitable from prenatal to post-delivery and beyond. Challenging us to improve our physical activity by just 2% each week, Jamie stressed how important it is to our overall well-being to get moving. If the goal is to be active a minimum of 15 minutes/day 3 days/week, that is only 45 minutes each week. A 2% improvement would only be 9 minutes...laughably doable.
She stressed that physical activity doesn't have to look like traditional exercise. Make a few extra trips up and down the stairs. Do jumping jacks on commercials. Let your kids chase you around the yard. Just do it, like the slogan says.
I was happy to be her assistant, with my baby model Minnie.
She made us hold a squat for a long time!
Pretty good form, huh?
The team was happy to demonstrate the dyna-bands.
She stressed that physical activity doesn't have to look like traditional exercise. Make a few extra trips up and down the stairs. Do jumping jacks on commercials. Let your kids chase you around the yard. Just do it, like the slogan says.
I was happy to be her assistant, with my baby model Minnie.
She made us hold a squat for a long time!
Pretty good form, huh?
The team was happy to demonstrate the dyna-bands. Thanks Jamie for getting us motivated...looking for some great results, girls!
Friday, February 10, 2012
Friendship
In an informal study, about 70% of moms attend Mom Time in hopes of meeting new friends. In a formal study done by UCLA, friendships between women are shown to release oxytocin in the brain, which is the feel-good neurotransmitter. When women are stressed, being close to their friends has a calming effect...and all God's girls said "Duh!" We know all this instinctively, but getting from standing in the same room with a bunch of moms and growing in a friendship is a process, but not impossible.
In researching for this talk, I found an article on Wiki-how with featuring 23 steps to making friends, which I condensed for our lesson. You can read the full article here.
The first thing you need to do is smile. Picture what your face is doing when you aren't thinking about what your face is doing. Do you look like the kind of person someone wants to start a conversation with, or do you look stressed out and preoccupied, like you don't want to be bothered? Sometimes we send out "Back Off!" messages without knowing it, so think about your expression.
Second, speak up. Learn to make small talk. In a group like MT, you have some givens. Everyone has kids, so use that as a conversation starter. I am not a naturally outgoing person, so sometimes I pretend to be someone brave if I'm nervous about starting a conversation. Eventually it starts to flow. If talking to others really leaves you wanting to faint, have a standard line you use. Compliment the sweater or hairstyle of every person you meet if that is what it takes to break the ice. When you close your conversation, if you haven't done so already, introduce yourself. "By the way, my name is so and so." The next time you see this person, you will already have a connection to build on.
Let's assume you've smiled and made a little small talk, and your conversation is coming to a close. If you want to further the connection, arrange a get-together. Invite them to coffee, or suggest you take the kiddoes to the park one day. If you've discovered a hobby in common, plan something along those lines.
Making friends as adults can be difficult, but we were made for connection; friendships add richness to life. Once you've made a friend, follow the Four B's:
Debbie
In researching for this talk, I found an article on Wiki-how with featuring 23 steps to making friends, which I condensed for our lesson. You can read the full article here.
The first thing you need to do is smile. Picture what your face is doing when you aren't thinking about what your face is doing. Do you look like the kind of person someone wants to start a conversation with, or do you look stressed out and preoccupied, like you don't want to be bothered? Sometimes we send out "Back Off!" messages without knowing it, so think about your expression.
Second, speak up. Learn to make small talk. In a group like MT, you have some givens. Everyone has kids, so use that as a conversation starter. I am not a naturally outgoing person, so sometimes I pretend to be someone brave if I'm nervous about starting a conversation. Eventually it starts to flow. If talking to others really leaves you wanting to faint, have a standard line you use. Compliment the sweater or hairstyle of every person you meet if that is what it takes to break the ice. When you close your conversation, if you haven't done so already, introduce yourself. "By the way, my name is so and so." The next time you see this person, you will already have a connection to build on.
Let's assume you've smiled and made a little small talk, and your conversation is coming to a close. If you want to further the connection, arrange a get-together. Invite them to coffee, or suggest you take the kiddoes to the park one day. If you've discovered a hobby in common, plan something along those lines.
Making friends as adults can be difficult, but we were made for connection; friendships add richness to life. Once you've made a friend, follow the Four B's:
- Be a good friend. Sounds redundant, but what I mean is be interested in them. Don't just have friends to support your life, but so you can enrich theirs as well. Remember birthdays. Listen to their dreams. Sometimes just sitting with someone is the kindest act you can provide.
- Be trustworthy, and trusting. Don't share their business with everyone else just because you got the scoop on something. It's called gossip and will destroy the foundation of a friendship faster than anything. Also trust them...give them the benefit of the doubt if they are snarky towards you. Don't be quick to write them off; maybe they've had an awful day and you called at the wrong time.
- Be reliable. If you say you are going to do something, do it. If you are meeting up with them, don't be late. It implies that their time isn't as valuable as yours.
- Be there. Friendship requires sacrifice. In Proverbs, we're told that a friend loves at all times. In John 3:16, we're taught that God so loved the world that He gave His Son. Love gives. When friendships get hard, or it isn't just all fun and games, don't bail. You will miss growing the deepest sweetest relationship with someone who probably needs you more than ever. Watch her kids, make her a meatloaf, offer to run an errand. Invest in your friendship, and it will pay off.
Debbie
Sunday, January 22, 2012
It's Spring!!
Ok, maybe not on the weather calendar. But here at Fox River Christian Church, we are getting ready to kick off our spring semester of Journey groups. The Mom Time Team is hard at work planning the next 15 weeks for you. Our semester is called Living By The Book, and that is what we are going to figure out how to do.
Did you know the Bible has something to say about every area of your life? From running your home to caring for yourself, to raising your kids and handling your relationships, God has not left us without guidance. But, finding that information and figuring out how to apply it can be two different things. We are going to walk through some of the challenges that come with this season of motherhood together, providing good practical instruction and a lot of fun along the way.
If you have never been out to Mom Time, here is a little of what to expect: We meet from 9:30-11:00 every Tuesday from January 31st-May 15, taking off the Tuesday following Easter. 9:30-9:45 is snack and chat time, grabbing some coffee and treats and visitng with friends, with announcements at 9:45. Large group teaching time is about 35-40 minutes, and you go to your small groups at 10:30. We keep the topics relevant to what you may be experiencing as a mom, and there is no homework other than figuring out what you want to apply to your own life.
Scroll through the blog and see some of the topics we covered last semester, which focused on finding contentment in motherhood.
There is no cost to attend Mom Time, although we may do a project or something that might cost money, and if you need childcare, you must register and pay for that, which is reasonably priced. If you have any questions, you can stop by the Journey table at church or email Luanne, our Women's Ministry Director at church. She can be reached at lglass@foxriverchristian.org.
On behalf of the whole team, we are looking forward to a great semester, rekindling old friendships, and beginning new ones.
Debbie Giese
Director of Mom Time, Fox River Christian Church
Did you know the Bible has something to say about every area of your life? From running your home to caring for yourself, to raising your kids and handling your relationships, God has not left us without guidance. But, finding that information and figuring out how to apply it can be two different things. We are going to walk through some of the challenges that come with this season of motherhood together, providing good practical instruction and a lot of fun along the way.
If you have never been out to Mom Time, here is a little of what to expect: We meet from 9:30-11:00 every Tuesday from January 31st-May 15, taking off the Tuesday following Easter. 9:30-9:45 is snack and chat time, grabbing some coffee and treats and visitng with friends, with announcements at 9:45. Large group teaching time is about 35-40 minutes, and you go to your small groups at 10:30. We keep the topics relevant to what you may be experiencing as a mom, and there is no homework other than figuring out what you want to apply to your own life.
Scroll through the blog and see some of the topics we covered last semester, which focused on finding contentment in motherhood.
There is no cost to attend Mom Time, although we may do a project or something that might cost money, and if you need childcare, you must register and pay for that, which is reasonably priced. If you have any questions, you can stop by the Journey table at church or email Luanne, our Women's Ministry Director at church. She can be reached at lglass@foxriverchristian.org.
On behalf of the whole team, we are looking forward to a great semester, rekindling old friendships, and beginning new ones.
Debbie Giese
Director of Mom Time, Fox River Christian Church
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