Notes from the Bookshelf: Boundaries with Children

Have you ever had days when your whole “Mom System” just shuts down because the kids have gone beyond pushing your buttons? Perhaps what is lacking in the household is a clear set of boundaries for your children and for yourself.  This week, Aziza taught on boundaries with kids, how to manage them, support them, and plant roots for their future.

There are three areas of influence that boundaries can have on our kids, teaching (learning that they are responsible for the behavior), modeling (lead by example), and internalizing (making a fact reality).  Within these boundaries, offer a true sense of freedom by allowing them choices to be made on their own.  Praise and increase their freedoms the more responsible they become.

Aziza also encouraged us to remember that emotions run strong in our children.  It’s good to empathize with our kids but also to correct them and teach them different ways to deal with their feelings.  For those moments when you feel like your children have the upper hand on you, keep in mind that disrespect is normal but it is something that should be called out and not to be continued.  Keep your stance and boundaries firm and constant with your children. 

Finally, try to keep the current of your family flowing all in the same direction.  Remind your kids that you are for them rather than against them.  Pray for your children, not just to get through the day but for their future. We all need grace and forgiveness, let’s not forget that we have a watchful Father who is trying to set boundaries for us as well.